Also available - EMOTIONAL MANAGEMENT FOR ORDINARY FOLK
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1. ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY
11th December 1972
Apollo 17, the last manned mission to the moon, lands safely on the lunar surface
With a crew made up of Commander Eugene Cernan, Command Module Pilot Ronald Evans, and Lunar Module Pilot Harrison Schmitt, the landing site was chosen with the primary objectives of Apollo 17 in mind: to sample lunar highland material older than the impact that formed Mare Imbrium, and investigate the possibility of relatively new volcanic activity in the same area. Cernan, Evans and Schmitt returned to Earth on December 19 after a 12-day mission
It was also the first mission to be commanded by a person with no background as a test pilot, and the first to have no one on board who had been a test pilot; X-15 test pilot Joe Engle lost the lunar module pilot assignment to Schmitt, a scientist. The mission broke several records: the longest moon landing, longest total extravehicular activities (moonwalks), largest lunar sample, and longest time in lunar orbit.
It was also the first mission to be commanded by a person with no background as a test pilot, and the first to have no one on board who had been a test pilot; X-15 test pilot Joe Engle lost the lunar module pilot assignment to Schmitt, a scientist. The mission broke several records: the longest moon landing, longest total extravehicular activities (moonwalks), largest lunar sample, and longest time in lunar orbit.
Three more missions had been planned, but were cancelled due to the ruinous cost, so to partly compensate, Apollo 17's mission was extended to three days on the lunar surface.
2. TODAY IN MY LIFE
Blogging
Ironing
Me Time
Meditation
Shift 1 of the Weekend Job
TV Comedy Night
Twitter Followers = 2,044 (no change)
Non-followed eliminated = 0
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Unfollowers eliminated = 1
@LyndaHudsonHypn
New Followers followed back = 1
@LOA_Lover
Spammers not followed back = 0
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3. TODAY'S SELF-OBSERVATION
However, as happy as she and I are, it's still kinda lonely. No one other than other carers really understand what it's like. Psychotics seem quite normal at first glance, no worse than eccentric in conversation. But its only when you get involved with them that you see they are nuts. Unlike neurotics however, who know they have issues, psychotics cannot see how nuts they are - they think everyone else is unreasonable.
The antipsychotic medication suppresses the delusions by reducing the levels of serotonin, the brain's "ideas generator". However this at first also made Missus very depressed, so she also has to take Citalopram to compensate. After some tweaking and fine-tuning, the Psychiatrist finally got the doses right.
However, the medication doesn't "fix" her - it only makes her functional, and there are side-effects. The obvious one is significant weight gain, but if you have to choose between a fat one and an insane one, it's a no-brainer. The second one is "zombification" - if you suppress the brain's ideas generation, the result is "tunnel perception" - she just doesn't notice things in her peripheral awareness.
What you end up with is a very sweet child with adult tastes and a libido - when the task and condition is set, as in her job, she is (to my knowledge!) fine, but is unable to do anything that requires initiative and organization, such as the housework. She is very slow to learn anything new and can learn nothing by explanation - only by manual repetition does she "get it"
Once you accept all this and just get on with it, life is actually very good - I have a space and freedom few husbands enjoy and the home is now Shangri-La - the ultimate place to be. The fly in the ointment is Daughter, who unfortunately is nuts in a far more unpleasant way.
The only people to my knowledge who really know what she's like is myself and Son, as we have both been on the end of her manipulative malevolence. What I find particularly chilling about her is her utter lack of empathy. She wants and needs people, but is not able to "feel their pain" nor able to confront her own failings. Instead, she blames everyone and everything else, and specifically ME. I cannot recall any admission or a single expression of any genuine contrition or remorse from her for anything she has done.
I finally reached "Michael Myers Point" - after so many years attempting to get on with her, I am now endeavouring to keep her the hell out of my life. Unfortunately I am convinced it's genetic - I see the same traits in Mother and Sister. At least with the latter two they are easy to exclude - Missus however, as good mothers do, loves her daughter.
This leaves me in a position that though not utterly impossible is very difficult. If Daughter hated me and showed love, kindness and sympathy to her mother, that I could live with. Unfortunately she does not. The way she speaks and texts to her mother when she is in any way not happy is frankly appalling. She makes no allowances at all for her mother's severe mental illness. Missus bless her, whether it be senses dulled by medication or inbuilt goodness, soaks it all up and is perpetually forgiving - willing to say sorry when she's innocent, just to keep the peace.
Like all the learning in my life, I've had no help and had to learn myself by trial-and-error the best way to manage the situation. I have to accept that daughter will treat missus badly, and count on Missus to defend herself if it gets too bad. I will only move to intervene if Missus has been clearly broken by Daughter's behaviour. To prevent my own buttons getting pushed, I have now imposed "Daughter Free Zones" - when I am with Missus, Missus is prevented from being available to Daughter. I also now refuse to discuss Daughter with Missus.
You may be forgiven for thinking that this doesn't sound like a recipe for happiness, but in fact I am. I have learned an absolutely crucial lesson - that happiness is NOT the absence of challenges or negativity, but rather making a difference your way. This I most certainly am doing. It's true what they say - what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I understand that there are fans, neutrals and predators, and I have learned to respond accordingly and appropriately. I'd love someone to turn round and tell me I've done really well - though I'd collapse into floods of tears if they did - but I know, I like myself and all parts of me are pulling the same way - there is no internal conflict.
I understand the Yin-Yang nature of the universe, the need for courage, to fight as well as love, and who and want I am. I am in a warm comfortable, loving peaceful place, and my bassline emotion is gratitude. Finally, I get it.
4. TODAY'S QUESTION FOR YOU
Do you understand?
5. TODAY'S WEATHER IN BRADFORD
Showers all day. Showers will clear in the later evening and it will be dry overnight
A cool and strong-to-moderate westerly or south-westerly will blow throughout
Max Temp = 6 degC at 6pm
Min Temp = 4 degC at 10am
Sunrise at 08:14
Sunset at 15:46
Moon: New Moon
Weathertrack: A series of troughs will cross Britain today
Air Pressure: 1016 millibars and static
6. TODAY'S ONELINER
I spend 99% of my drunk time chasing my cat around trying to give him a hug :D
7. NOW THAT'S FUNNY!
Jim Meskimen - master impressionist very good!
8. TRIVIA
Cartilage is one of the few tissues that grows throughout life. Between ages 30 and 70, a nose might grow half an inch, and the ears grow about a quarter of an inch.
9. ZEN WISDOM
The full realization of one’s inner potential can be achieved only through interaction with the world of everyday reality.
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