MONDAY 14th OCTOBER 2013 09:10 BST

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1. THIS DAY IN WORLD WAR 2 (14th October 1943)
On the Russian Front...
Soviet Southwest Front takes full control of Zaporozhe
Soviet South Front and German 6th Army engaged in heavy fighting for Melitopol in southern Ukraine.

Over Germany...
The Luftwaffe inflict heavy losses on the US 8th Air Force, shooting down 60 bombers in a raid on Schweinfurt, but themselves lose 51 Fighters

In London...
The Headquarters of US Army Air Forces in the UK are formed to control US 8th and 9th Air Forces 

In Italy...  
British 8th Army captures Campobasso
US 5th Army attacks across the Volturno River continue
The Port of Naples is opened for Allied shipping

In the Pacific...
Japanese vessel Kozui Maru is sunk by USN submarine Grayback 
The pro-Japanese Republic of the Philippines is proclaimed, and Japan and the Philippines sign Pact of Alliance granting independence to Manila under Japanese advisers

Today's Air Raids...
Schweinfurt, Germany by US 8th Air Force
Northern France RAF Fighter patrols
Alexishafen, New Guinea by US 5th Air Force
Cape Gloucester, New Britain by US 5th Air Force

2. TODAY IN MY LIFE
Blogging
The Milk Run 
Quality Missus Time
Housework
Online marketing/Bookwriting
Missus Time in the evening 

Twitter Followers = 1,685 (no change)
Nonfollowed eliminated = 0
Unfollowers eliminated = 0
New Followers = 0

3. TODAY'S SELF-OBSERVATION
With Missus off work for Eid-Al-Adha, my attention will be diverted to some extent in meeting her needs, and with Son's college unaffected, this will include in the groin department as she takes advantage of his absence. Though her libido is high, she has not reached nymphomaniac level, so I suspect one little blue tablet will suffice, as one thunderous climax usually keeps her happy for a day. Son has no tutorials on Tuesday in any case so we are only talking a couple of extra performances in total. 

Now familiar with their potency and the best timing to take them, my little blue friends mean performance on demand is guaranteed, so I can now relax on that score, especially since the recently-released generic form is very affordable. Marital harmony, and indeed bliss, is secured for the moment.

Of greater concern is the vast quantities of cash required to support Son's attempted entry into a conservatoire. The Scottish Conservatoire audition has proved particularly expensive - £200 and 48 hours of my time for a gamble that rests on around five minutes for Son to impress the panel. He of course is feeling the pressure, but I have reassured him that there will be no fallout from his parents in the event of failure. 

Nevertheless, with his 18th birthday also coming up, we expect to need to borrow at least £500. We of course have no hesitation in doing this - indeed it was me who has instigated it all, and even in the event of his total failure, I would have no regrets. In fact I will be there to pick him back up off the floor in that event. In return he gives me everything I ever wanted from my children - gratitude, appreciation and respect. For that reason I will support him to my last breath.

4. TODAY'S QUESTION FOR YOU
Are you giving your loved ones the time and energy you deserve?

5. TODAY'S WEATHER IN BRADFORD
Rain, heavy at times, will persist throughout the day.
It will become drier after dark, but remain cloudy.
The consistent north-easterly wind will ease off after dark
Max Temp = 10 degC
Min Temp = 8 degC
Sunrise at 07:32
Sunset at 18:13

6. TODAY'S ONELINER
The Beckhams called daughter Harper Seven, but if they'd juggled the letters she could've been Even Sharper.

7. NOW THAT'S FUNNY!
Michael McIntyre - Fir and Mná  

8. TRIVIA
The brains of adult men are about 10% larger in total size than the brains of women. This is because men generally have a larger stature and more muscle mass than women, so their brains require more neurons to control it all.

9. ZEN WISDOM
Your voice resonates with life. Because this is so, it can touch the lives of others.